Be You!
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson
To keep up with our BE YOU theme this summer:
Check your inbox on Monday for our BE YOU weekly email.
Follow GAC on Instagram
(Use hashtag #GACbeyou.)
Be You!
It sounds like such a simple task. After all, aren’t we all just automatically ourselves?
But it’s actually not as simple as it seems. We all feel pressure to fulfill expectations, fit in, go with the flow, look and act a certain way, and do what everyone else is doing.
Sometimes all of that pressure can lead to feelings that we’re not enough just the way we are. Confidence can be eroded when we feel like we’re falling short.
At GAC we believe in encouraging campers and staff to accept and celebrate our own and others’ strengths and unique traits. “Being You” is one of our core values, and many kids tell us that they feel freer to be themselves at camp than in other places. Campers and staff often report that they feel like they can “be themselves” at camp.
Each year, we pick a theme to help guide us through camp. This summer, even though we won’t be together at camp, we’ll be exploring and sharing about what it means to be our true, authentic selves.
We’ll encourage campers to explore what it means to be their “best selves” with questions like these:
- What do I like best about myself?
- What do I really enjoy doing?
- What are my goals?
- What do I dream of doing?
- What are the personality quirks and strengths that make me special?
- How can I be kinder to myself with my “self talk”?
- How can I encourage and support my friends in being their authentic selves?
When we spend time talking and thinking about the interests, traits, and strengths that make us who we are, we gain self-awareness, which is an important aspect of emotional intelligence and one that helps us be a better friend to others. Self-awareness also builds our confidence and ability to understand that we don’t need to be an expert or be perfect at everything. No one is!
When we support our friends by pointing out their strengths and the unique, cool things we like about them, we strengthen our friendships, too.
This summer , not only will we be learning about how to be our best selves, we’ll be learning about how to help our friends be their best selves, too!
Our “Be You” theme for 2020 gives us the opportunity to take advantage of our extra time for reflection (because we’re all stuck at home) and reconnect with what makes us awesome just the way we are.
Check out Monkey and Soy’s formal announcement of our theme (back in January, before we knew we’d be stuck at home this summer), complete with many “b” based puns, enjoy this video:
My School In Motion!
My School In Motion, founded by camp parent Apryl Krakovsky, is a program designed to get school communities moving and learning every day. Their videos are fun exercise routines for kids and adults that incorporate positive messaging about health, wellness, and nutrition.
“My School In Motion, Inc.’s mission is to provide all students, regardless of race or socioeconomic status, with an early positive physical activity experience, while at the same time educating them in the areas of nutrition, fitness and wellness, and empowering them to make smart choices today and in the future. We want to ensure that students have the best start to every school day and set them on a path for a lifetime of health, productivity and happiness.”
We are lucky enough to be able to share some of My School In Motion’s exercise routines to you in your home! Do these routines with your family and enjoy the fun you have with them!
Movement Routines: Good Life, Boom Boom Pow, I Like to Move It, PB & Jelly Time
Movement Routines: PB & Jelly Time, Who Let the Dogs Out, Cupid Shuffle
Movement Routines: Popcorn, U Can’t Touch This, Jack Attack, Good Life
Movement Routines: Set A Goal – One Step at a Time Warm-Up, Waka Waka, I Like to Move It, Cupid Shuffle, Yoga/Focused Breathing Cool Down
Movement Routines: Sunburst, Just Say Yes, 5678, Who Let the Dogs Out, Agadoo
Movement Routines: Dynamite, 5678, Addams Family, Macarena, Agadoo, Focused Breathing/Balloon
Movement Routines: Cardio Routine 1, PB&Jelly Time, Waka Waka, Just Say Yes, Good Morning Sky
Talking With Kids About Camp Being Canceled
For some of our campers and staff – especially for those who have been counting down the days to their session and anticipating getting back to their favorite place on earth – the cancellation of GAC 2020 is yet another loss in a year that has already been full of loss. This pandemic is leaving no person or place untouched.
We are aware that the cancellation of camp makes an already difficult time even harder, and we had really hoped not to have to cancel all of our summer sessions. We know how beneficial camp would be for our community this summer.
We are committed to providing resources and support to our camp families during this difficult time. We will continue to stay connected to our camp community, and we will share resources with you. We will also encourage our campers and staff to continue practicing GAC’s values.
Specifically, we will be encouraging our camp families to:
• Unplug and connect face-to-face with family members and others you are sheltering with.
• Get outside and experience the awe of nature.
• Practice kindness.
• Practice positivity and encourage others.
GALA (Gold Arrow Leadership Academy)
For those families who are interested in having some GAC connection and growth this summer, we are offering a four-week virtual camp program with consistent groups and counselors. The groups will meet three times per week for four weeks.
For more information, visit:
GALAMS (6-8th grades)
GALA (9-12th grades)
Resources for Parents
Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D. has many helpful videos and resources for helping us and our children through this pandemic. The video below is particularly helpful as we help our kids process their disappointment over cancelled summer plans.
Sunshine talked with Tina on her podcast several weeks ago for this episode:
Ep. 136: Showing Up for our Kids during COVID-19
As you communicate with your kids about the cancellation of camp, expect that your kids may be upset. Psychologist and educator Dr. Christopher Thurber recommends that you don’t try to give advice or problem solve right away. For many kids, there isn’t a substitute for camp. Dr. Thurber recommends we let our kids sit with their grief for as long as they need to and we give them the space to talk about their feelings.
Grieving the Loss of Summer Camp: Concepts for adults to understand before talking with kids
Sunshine talks about validating kids’ feelings in this video:
Maintain the foundations of wellness & promote kids’ mental health
Dr. Thurber also recommends we make sure our kids are eating and sleeping well and getting exercise.
For more information on the “Triumvirate of Good Health,” listen to the interview Sunshine did with Dr. Jess Shatkin, a board-certified child, adolescent, and adult psychiatrist who leads the educational efforts of the NYU Department of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, about promoting our kids’ mental health.
Listen to Sunshine Parenting Ep. 124: Promoting Mental Health with Dr. Jess Shatkin
Dr. Thurber has some new resources for parents to help debrief with kids about their grief about the cancellation of camp and other important events this year. You can download this PDF with his talking points, and you might want to also watch Dr. Thurber’s 9-minute video “Way Worse Than a Rainy Day” with your camper to help you with your communication. Activate your subscription for Dr. Thurber’s video and other resources at prep4camp.com. Use GAC coupon code GOLDARWP4C at check out (we have pre-paid for our families to access these resources). Instructions are included below.
Step 1: Click here to access the “Way Worse than a Rainy Day” video by Dr. Chris Thurber
Step 2: Click “Get Access Now”
Step 3: Select “Prep4Camp” under “Choose offer”, then click “Continue” (no payment is required!)
Step 4: Fill in your information to “Create an account”
Step 5: On the right side of your screen enter GOLDARWP4C for the “Discount code” and click “Apply”
Step 6: Click “Complete” in the center of your screen and wait 5 seconds for the site to redirect you to the “Way Worse than a Rainy Day” video
Talking Points with Children & Teens
It’s not all about COVID-19.
Although the pandemic has dominated the news and our lives, plenty of kids are coping with stressors far
greater than other people’s getting coronavirus. Don’t assume that a young person’s social-emotional distress has anything to do with COVID-19. If a child is upset, try: “I can see you’re upset. What’s bothering you?”
It’s hard to talk about silver linings.
For some young people (and adults, of course), there have been positive aspects to spending more time at
home, more time with family, and more time alone. Try asking an open-ended and two-pronged question,
such as, “What have been the best and worst things about the past few months?” to allow for positives.
Be direct and avoid euphemisms.
When children are coping with death, euphemisms such as “went to sleep” can be confusing. Little kids might take what you say literally and start to fear bedtime; older kids might feel like you are too uncomfortable to have an honest conversation. Be direct instead. It’s OK to say, “There won’t be on-site camp this summer.”
Expect wide-ranging emotions and behaviors.
Grief does not follow a predictable course, nor does it feel or look the same in everyone. It can come and go in waves. And just because kids look OK does not mean they feel OK inside. Check in periodically without obsessing. Remember that it’s healthy for a grieving person to laugh, have fun, and participate in activities.
Probe and process the memories.
The young people you care for miss different things about camp, so it will feel supportive to ask, “What will/do you miss the most about camp?” Resist the urge to suggest the important memories. And remember that not all kids prefer to express their grief verbally; many want to draw, journal, or talk with peers instead of you.
Cancellation is not death.
There are two important points here:
(1) All but the youngest children understand that death is final, but everyone knows that something that is cancelled could—in theory—be reinstated. Expect kids to argue, reason, and want to discuss how camp could be un-canceled. That’s a normal, healthy way to come to terms with the finality of a decision.
(2) Remember that as much as we are all grieving cancellations, camp is ultimately a “nice-to-have,” not a “need-to-have.” At some point, gently share some perspective about how cancellation is an unselfish way to keep other people healthy. Offer hopeful messages about summer 2021.
Psychologist & Educator for Kids & Camp Families
@drchristhurber Around the World.
Prep4Camp.com Copy only with permission. © 2020
What Campers are Grieving
According to Dr. Thurber, there are some common things kids might be grieving, including:
• The loss of the face-to-face communication, interaction with people, the opportunity to form lifelong friendships, and the chance to reconnect with their best friends in the whole world.
• The loss of the “camp vibe,” the culture of positivity and fun and the kind way people treat each other.
• The loss of the physical contact that is a big part of camp – the high fives, hugs, and fist bumps that fill our camp days.
• The loss of some of the specific, fun activities campers only have the chance to do at camp.
• The loss of the beauty of the camp setting and the positive memories that being at camp evokes.
• The loss of the opportunity to relax, have fun being goofy, and be free from the stresses of school, competitive sports, social media, etc.
We hope your camper will be back with us in 2021, when we will all be even more grateful for our time together at camp. In the meantime, we hope you’ll stay connected with us and participate in our online events this summer and live events (GAC Runners events, GAC Parties, etc.) next year.
Whadda In Place
“Look, Mom! We made a fort!”
“Look, Mom! We made a fort!”
I hope the wince on my face looked more like a smile as I surveyed the efforts my children, ages 4 and 7, had made to create a fort using every pillow, blanket, and stuffed animal they could find. I am glad the girls had some fun (and even more fun learning how to fold the blankets as we put them all away), but this scene is representative of the chaos that ensues after days on end of being stuck at home and having to juggle our work schedules while supervising playtime.
I can’t imagine how any parent could feel successful in every realm of life right now. Between parenting, e-learning, work commitments, household duties, cooking, shopping, and self-care, everyone is stretched and scrambling to find balance in our “new normal.”
For the past three weeks, we have been working with some of our awesome GAC counselors to put together virtual events to help provide connection and fun for our campers and camp families in an otherwise challenging time. We hope you have been able to attend some of our live events on Zoom or on Facebook or have viewed the recorded events on YouTube.
Our Afternoon Assemblies have been a fun time for campers and counselors to play games, sing songs, hear the Joke-of-the-Day, and reminisce about the fun we have at Morning Assembly each day at camp.
Our Virtual Campfires have served as a great way for campers to connect to similar-age peers in small groups. The group leaders facilitate discussions, play games, and help campers meet and talk with each other. We have been very happy with the campers’ ability to engage with each other, listen patiently, and share openly in their groups.
Big Virtual Campfire was a big, virtual success, with many campers and counselors submitting acts that showcased a variety of talents. We’re looking forward to our next Big Virtual Campfire next week!
For the next two weeks, we are launching a series of virtual events we’re calling, “Whadda in Place: Bringing a Little Summer into Spring!” Our virtual events have some new and exciting twists, including special events at the beginning of each Virtual Campfire, a virtual camp dance for the whole family, and our next Big Virtual Campfire to conclude the two weeks of fun.
Here’s the schedule of the upcoming virtual events:
This Week:
TODAY, Monday April 6, 4pm PT: Afternoon Assembly on Zoom or Facebook Live.
Tuesday, April 7 @ 4pm PT: Bingo Fun & Virtual Campfire (email us for login details)
Thursday, April 9 @ 4pm PT: Magic with Dan Chan the Magic Man & Virtual Campfire! Bring a quarter, 2 rubber bands, and a deck of cards to join in on the magic! (email us for login details)
Next Week:
Monday, April 13 @ 4pm PT: Afternoon Assembly on Zoom or Facebook Live.
Tuesday, April 14 @ 4pm PT: Trivia Game & Virtual Campfire (email us for login details)
Thursday, April 16 @ 4pm PT: Jersday Thursday Sports Dance! Dress in your sports gear as we host a virtual dance party–just like a camp dance! (email us for login details)
Friday, April 17 @ 4pm: Big Campfire (Send your acts of kindness or theme day activity photos & videos by Wednesday, April 15, for the slideshow!) Watch the fun live on Zoom or Facebook Live, or watch it with your popcorn and Red Vines on YouTube when you want.
Family Fun Days!
We love having theme days at camp, and we’ve put together some great theme days for you to do at home with your family. We have curated activities, recipes, crafts, and songs that correspond with the themes and hopefully take some of the work out of creating family fun at your house. Take pictures or videos of your family doing these activities and email them to mail@goldarrowcamp.com or post them on social media with #whaddainplace. We will use the photos for a slideshow at our next Big Virtual Campfire to show our GAC families having some fun together!
Each theme day provides several suggestions for family fun, and you can pick and choose the activities, recipes, and crafts that work best for your family. Even if you only pick one or two activities from each theme day, we hope you will find these to be helpful and fun resources.
Click each graphic below for the theme day information and a materials checklist:
We would love to hear your feedback about these virtual events and can’t wait to see pictures of your family as you “Whadda in Place!” You can email us your photos or tag us on social media (@goldarrowcamp) and use the hashtag #whaddainplace. We can’t wait to see what you do!
12 Stay at Home Tips
Want some stay-at-home tips for your family?
We’re all spending a lot of time at home these days during COVID-19, and it’s good for our mental and emotional health to mix things up once in a while.
Here’s a recap of the ideas Sunshine’s been sharing at our virtual Afternoon Assemblies!
#1 Participate in 30 Days of Kindness
Focus on others by doing small (and large) acts of kindness, and it will make you feel better, too!
#2 Mail a hand-written letter or note
Everyone LOVES getting a real letter in the mail. Collect the random cards and stationery from around your house (or in your camp supplies). Next, write a postcard, note, or letter and mail it to a friend, relative, or even a stranger (see ideas in 30 Days of Kindness)! You might even get one back, which is super fun!
Many kids do not know how to address a letter. Take time to learn, and you’ll be all set for writing letters from camp!
#3 Learn to cook something new
What’s a favorite recipe you want to learn how to cook? Take this time at home to learn how to cook something (or several things)! Cook the recipe three times, each time doing the cooking more independently.
Step 1 Cook the recipe with your parent.
Step 2 Cook the recipe with your parent supervising, but you doing all the cooking.
Step 3 Cook the recipe on your own. Let your parent relax while you cook!
Here are a few moments of video of Sunshine supervising (Step 2 above) her 16-year-old making this POMEGRANATE HABANERO SHREDDED BEEF RECIPE:
Bonus: Send us your favorite recipe and/or create a video tutorial of how to make the recipe (see Joss’ below):
#4 Clean out your game/puzzle cabinet(s)
What’s even in there? Go through your games and puzzles. Find a favorite or two to get out to play as a family. For ones you no longer use because they are for younger kids , create a stack to donate to another family or neighbor. For ones with missing pieces, recycle, use for creating a craft, or put in the trash.
#5 Make a list of 10 things you’ve been wanting to do
With school now online and extracurricular activities, sports, and in-person social time with friends limited, we’ve got some extra time on our hands. This is – for many of us – a new situation. And it can feel uncomfortable having so much down time. Try writing a list of 10 things ranging from random “to dos” to things you’d like to learn. This can include books you’ve wanted to read, hobbies or crafts you’ve been interested in trying, a musical instrument you’d like to learn to play or practice playing more, learning sign language, or anything else that comes to mind for you! You can try to include things that include:
• Something physical (train for a 5K run, do a daily plank, try an online yoga class)
• Something creative (friendship bracelet, crochet, painting)
• Something social (call or write a letter to a friend)
• Things you haven’t had time for (a book you’ve wanted to read or movie you’ve wanted to watch)
Then, take the first step. Start reading the book or research how to do the hobby.
#6 Sort your books by color
Do you love books and reading? Take some time to organize your books. Create a beautiful shelf by organizing your books by color!
#7 Move some furniture (or create a little quiet space just for yourself)
To make your home feel a little different, move some furniture around a bit so that it feels “new.” Or, create a little space for yourself on a cozy chair or on some pillows in your bedroom or a closet or room that doesn’t get much use. Put some of your favorite “quiet” activities in a basket or box there – things like mazes, coloring supplies, books to read, or crafts to do.
#8 Call or FaceTime a friend
Now that you’re an expert on Zoom and other online meeting platforms, organize a get-together with a friend or group of friends. To make it even more fun, have a theme like “crazy hair.” For a fun activity, get a game like Yahtzee that you can play together by each having your own set of dice! Or, play “Name that Tune” or “Pictionary.”
#9 Make family dinner like a campfire
Pretend you’re at camp around the campfire and you’re the counselor. Lead a discussion like counselors at camp do! Have every family member share their high, low, and hero of the day or ask a question that everyone answers.
#10 Brainstorm (as a family) things you’re interested in doing together for fun
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Nature walk: identify birds, build a trail
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Movie marathon: pick an actor and watch all the movies with that actor in it
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Puzzle competition with another family
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#11 Make a list of things to organize or spruce up in your room or house
#12 Find things to laugh at
Laughter makes us all feel better. Find funny memes and videos to share with each other. Even better, tell a joke or create a funny song or skit and share it with your friends at GAC so we can use it at our upcoming assemblies and campfires!
What are your tips for stay at home activities? Share them with us!
#GACkindness: 30 Days of Kindness
#GACkindness
Hi Camp Families & Staff,
Since we have more time to spend together (virtually) and with our families at home this month due to all of our extracurricular activities being cancelled, we thought we could work on a challenge together. We’re calling it 30 Days of Kindness. We’ll be talking about kindness in our Afternoon Assemblies and Virtual Campfires throughout April.
Want to join us for 30 Days of Kindness in April?
All you need to do is commit to doing 30 kind acts during the month of April. You can participate as an individual or as a family!
Here are ideas of what you can do:
• Commit to doing at least ONE daily kindness (DK) each day in April. These can be small acts of kindness or big ones – an encouraging sticky note to a parent or sibling or a bigger project. You can do the same thing every day – like writing one thank you note or text each day – or you can pick any combo of different kindness acts.
• Consider doing (alone or with your family) a bigger Weekend Kindness Challenge (WKC). We’ve included suggestions on the April Kindness Calendar.
April Kindness Calendar
Here is a printable version of our April Kindness Calendar! In addition to the Kindness Calendar, you can find ideas of people to write notes of appreciation to on our printable Kindness “BINGO” board! Keep track of how you’re spreading kindness using our printable Kindness Tracker! Also, here are some printable GACspirations to keep you inspired to spread kindness!
Daily Kindness (DK)
Follow along on our April Kindness Calendar for some ideas, or create your own kindness ideas you can do from home.
How many acts of kindness can you do this month? There are 30 days in April, so if you do one kind thing each day, that’s 30 ways to make yourself and others happier this month! If you miss a day, you can always do two acts of kindness on another day to catch up. And, if you go over 30 acts, all that means is that you’re spreading even more kindness to the world, which is a good thing.
Weekend Kindness Challenges (WKC)
Since on weekends we tend to have more time, we’ve saved some more time-intensive kindness ideas for the weekends in April. These are just suggestions. You can come up with your own kindness ideas, too!
WKC #1: Offer to Help Elderly Neighbors or Friends
The Random Acts of Kindness Foundation has free printable, “Hello, Let me know if you need help” cards. Distribute them to neighbors who may need assistance and offer to get them supplies when you get your family’s.
WKC #2: Send a Care Package or Order Essentials for Someone
Order essentials to be delivered to someone who may be in need during this time. This may be someone you know personally, or a place that you know thrives off of donations. Another option is to create a care package for someone who you know is working extra hard these days like a medical professional–again, this could be someone close to home (maybe your own family member!) or someone across the country.
WKC #3: Celebrate Earth Day (April 22)
With your extra time this month, you can celebrate Earth Day indoors by going through your belongings and donating any clothes or toys in good condition. Keeping these items out of landfills is a great way to celebrate this year! Other options that you can do throughout the month include washing dishes by hand, have a zero-waste lunch day, and sort trash and recyclables. There are additional ideas at Let Grow.
https://www.earthday.org/2020-teach-in-toolkit/
WKC #4: Plan a Virtual Celebration
There are many important events that are coming up in your friends’ and family members’ lives that we don’t want to forget just because we can’t celebrate how we usually would. Pick an upcoming event such as someone’s birthday, an anniversary, or a surprise thank you celebration and start planning! One thing that you can do is contact all of the person’s loved ones and ask them to send you a video, a message, or a physical note that you can collect and give to the person all at once on their special day. You can give them guidelines such as “tell them what you love about them” or “tell them a funny memory you have with them” or you can leave it open to the sender of the message. You could also organize all of the person’s loved ones to call them at different times throughout the day and deliver their messages personally. If you had enough time to receive physical letters, you could organize them into a book or a nice box for them to keep. Alternatively, you could plan a “surprise” virtual event (via Zoom or something similar) where all of the guests knew that it was a party for the special person. You can still “theme” the event even with everyone at home. It could be fancy or a fun costume theme, the possibilities are endless! Your special person will feel so loved that their day did not get overlooked just because everyone is inside. If this feels overwhelming to you, pick another friend or family member to help you brainstorm and plan what would be best for your special person!
DOWNLOADS
For Parents: Why is Kindness Important?
Being considerate of others will take your children further in life than any college degree.
Marian Wright Edelman
Being a considerate, kind person who thinks about others is a character trait that helps children form good relationships and leads to a happier life as an adult.
What does this mean for super competitive parents who want their children to succeed at all costs, even if it means cheating and being mean to others? It could be helpful for parents to know that research has clearly shown that kind people are happier people, and happier people, in turn, are more successful in life. In jobs and in future relationships, kindness will take our children “further in life than any college degree.”
Focusing on kindness needs to be a higher priority for everyone who cares about children.
In our cut-throat, competitive culture, where assertiveness and achievement are glorified and valued, focusing on developing kindness is often overlooked.
There are anti-bullying posters and speakers at most schools, but where is the message about the powerfully positive impact of kindness?
Parents and youth development professionals, including teachers, coaches, and camp staff, know that wording things positively and telling kids what we DO want them to do is far more effective than a list of “don’ts” and “nos.” So, why hasn’t this message translated into how we teach children to treat one another?
We’re talking with children a lot about not bullying each other, but we’re not talking with them enough about what we want them to be doing instead — which is, of course, to treat each other with respect and kindness. I propose that as parents and youth development professionals we flip the “anti-bullying” message into a “pro-kindness” one.
Ways to model and practice kindness
Get kids to focus on kindnesses that they have seen by asking them to point out kind acts they have witnessed or done.
Brainstorm with kids kind things they can do for others and help them follow through. Focus on small, easy kindnesses rather than huge things.
Talk with kids about how they feel after someone has done something kind for them or after they’ve done something kind for another person.
Questions to Ask Kids to Spur Conversations about Kindness
• Share something kind they’ve seen someone else do this past week.
• What’s the kindest thing someone has ever done for you?
• What are kind things we can do for our friends? Siblings? Parents? People we don’t know?
• How do you want to be remembered by your classmates and friends?
“You can’t live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you.”
— John Wooden
This topic is so important to Gold Arrow Camp and to Sunshine that she dedicated an entire chapter of her book, Happy Campers, to it: Camp Secret #8: Make it Cool to be Kind. Each chapter of Happy Campers ends with five different “Bringing Camp Home” activities to consider trying in your family.
More Kindness Ideas
Read (or listen to) Wonder by R.J. Palacio
One of GAC counselors’ favorite read-aloud books is R.J. Palacio’s Wonder. Consider reading (or listening – Audible version is free right now if you sign up for a free Audible trial) to Wonder individually or as a family read-aloud. Get some popcorn and have a family movie night to watch the movie version after you finish reading.
Do you like Pinterest? Check out Sunshine’s Kindness board.
Five Ways to Raise Kind Children, Greater Good Science Center
Being Kind Makes Kids Happy, Greater Good Science Center
The Power of Kindness, American Camp Association
Happiness Tip: Commit to Kindness (Christine Carter, Raising Happiness)
What Is the Best Age For Camp?
by Audrey “Sunshine” Monke
You probably want a number here. If you’re only going to read these first two sentences, then I’ll pick the age of nine.
But my real answer is a bit more complex. When to start sending your child to sleep-away camp is a decision that depends on you, your parenting style, and your child’s temperament. Many kids have extremely fun and successful camp experiences as young as six years old, but that’s too young for most kids. And, for some parents, the thought of their child EVER going to camp (without them) is unimaginable. If you’re one of those parents, please read Five Reasons Great Parents Send Their Kids to Camp. Sometimes, “he’s not ready for camp” actually means you’re not ready. Realizing that your child can be okay without you is sometimes hard on parents, and it’s a big step to let them have the independent experience of summer camp.
These are the guidelines I recommend to parents who are ready to send their child to camp but aren’t sure what age is best.
If your child is 5 or under, that’s too young for overnight camp alone. Go to a family camp together, or try an American Camp Association accredited day camp program in your area, which is a great way to get the feel for what camp is all about!
If your child is 6-8 years old:
- Your child is a fairly independent kid (not clingy to you) and can take a shower on his/her own. If your child happily goes to school and is fine at day camps and other activities without you constantly by his/her side, then he/she’s probably ready for camp. Parents often worry about the logistical stuff with young kids. “Will someone make sure he eats? Puts on sunscreen? What if he wets the bed?” Know that, at a well-run, accredited camp program, counselors are trained to take care of young children well. Counselors will make sure your camper gets enough water, eats properly, and puts on sunscreen. Most camps work with families of bed wetters to help them feel comfortable coming to camp. You just need to make a plan on how to manage the bed wetting with the staff at your child’s camp (using a pull-up and keeping small plastic trash bags in the bottom of the sleeping bag for the counselor to throw away privately works well).
- Your child is ASKING to go. This usually occurs with younger siblings who visit or hear about camp from older brothers and sisters. They’ve been watching and hearing about the fun for a few years and they want “in.” I’ve often been at camp events where older kids are coming to hear about camp, and the younger siblings in attendance end up begging their parents to let them go to camp, too.
- You, as the parent, are confident in your child’s ability to be away from you. And you are able to express that confidence to your child. And YOU can handle the separation.
For young kids, focus on if your child is ready. This is not the age to force camp upon a hesitant child.
Once your child is 9-10 years old, I have three different guidelines, depending on your child and you.
- If your 9-10 year old is excited to go to camp, go for it! Find a camp and sign him/her up!
- If your 9-10 year old is hesitant about going to camp:
- Talk with other families whose kids go to camp to expose him/her to the idea. Hearing how much other kids like camp might encourage him/her to want to go.
- Attend camp information sessions and browse websites. Watch camp videos to show your child the fun that happens at camp. If exposing your child to the idea of camp gets him/her excited, then forge ahead with signing up and sending your child to camp. If he/she gets “cold feet,” use these discussion strategies to let him/her know why camp will be good for him/her.
- If your 9-10 year old child is STILL hesitant, you have two choices:
The Hard Choice (Michael Thompson, PhD. would say the better one):
Tell your child, “I know you’re ready for this experience and it will be a good experience for you that I don’t want you to miss out on. I know you’re nervous, but this is something that is important for you to do.” Read the book Homesick and Happy as your homework before you broach the subject with your child. Explain all the benefits of camp and how you think camp will be great for him/her and how it is an important step in his/her growth and development. Let your child know that you, as the parent, think it’s an important experience that you don’t want him/her to miss out on. And then, sign up for a camp that is a good fit for your child and offers activities he/she is interested in! Making this choice requires being able to stand your ground and not give in to whining. Better to not dwell on the topic until it gets closer to summer. Sign up but don’t talk about it too much, too far in advance if your child is especially anxious about it.
The Easier Choice (for now):
Give your child a one year “pass,” but follow through! “Okay, no camp this summer, but next year you’re for sure going to a camp we choose together that is a good fit for you. I know you’re ready, and it will be a great experience for you that I don’t want you to miss out on. I know you’re nervous, but this is something that is important for you to do.” Read the book Homesick and Happy as your homework over the year! Follow through and make going to camp next summer non-optional. Talk with your friends and research an accredited camp program that’s a good fit for your child. Attend “meet and greet” events or camp tour days to meet other camp families.
Know that kids who are hesitant about camp at 9 or 10 are likely to still be hesitant at 13, and possibly hesitant at 18 about going to college. For kids who are nervous about being away from home and parents who need to figure out how to work through those feelings, a week or two at camp is an easy way to start! It’s actually easier to start camp at 9 or 10 and work through those difficult homesick emotions without also contending with puberty. So… knowing that it’s great to get your child some independent experience early, forge ahead confidently (or at least pretend you’re confident!).
If your child is 11:
It’s REALLY time. See the above steps but don’t do the easier choice. Remember when you were 11? Your best memories were not hanging out with your parents. Time to get some fun, independent experience!
If your child is 12 or older and has never been away to camp, please let them go! Seriously. I’ve been at camp fairs, where a mother with a child taller than she is tells me, in front of her child, “He’s WAY too young to be away from me for two weeks.” I look at the young person standing next to her and want to say, “He’s not too young. You just don’t want him to be away from you.” But, I can’t say that unless it’s a friend who I can be really frank with. So, I just feel badly for the kid, who longingly looks at camp pictures but knows that his mom won’t ever let him go.
Your older child will likely not be the only first-year camper his/her age. There will be fewer new kids at camp in that age group, but camp kids are welcoming, so don’t worry. Let your child be part of the process of picking a camp, but please send them to camp! I’ve met many families who waited until their child was 12 or 13 years old to start camp, only to be disappointed that they had so few summers to enjoy at camp before they were too old. Plus, the kids who tend to have the most extreme homesickness are the older ones who’ve never been away. But, if your child is one who may experience that extreme homesickness, isn’t it much better that it happen during a 2-3 week summer program than when they’re a freshman in college? Too many kids are not making it in college because they don’t have the coping skills to be away from home. Give your child the gift of early independence to help them develop the skills they need to thrive as a young adult!
So now you see why I couldn’t give a short answer. I hope this helps you make the decision of when is the best age to send your child to camp!
Five Life Skills Teens Get On The OLC (Outdoor Leadership Course)
By the end of high school, teens need to have mastered more skills than just reading, writing and math to be successful, thriving adults. Gold Arrow Camp’s Outdoor Leadership Course (OLC) helps campers develop important life skills that stretch them far beyond academics: Leadership, Independence, Communication Skills, Resilience, and Responsibility.
The OLC is a two-week program for young people interested in developing important life skills. Trained leaders guide OLC participants on a challenging, six-day, 30-mile backpacking trip into the High Sierras. Throughout the session, campers develop backcountry navigational and survival skills, practice wilderness first aid skills, and participate in GAC activities.
The purpose of OLC is to challenge teens to learn and grow in self-awareness, develop maturity, discover the value of community and working with others to solve problems and accomplish shared objectives. While growing and learning, participants develop five skills vital for success: Leadership, Independence, Communication Skills, Resilience, and Responsibility.
1. Leadership
“Being a part of OLC has influenced my life after camp because it taught me how to be a leader and being a part of a high school swim team, being a leader is a big part of staying together as a team.” – Sophia, OLC Participant
After arriving at camp, OLC participants receive leadership training before departing on the backpacking trip. They do exercises in team building, learn conflict resolution techniques, and practice positive communication. While in the wilderness, campers have the opportunity to learn and practice map and compass navigation, outdoor cooking, Leave No Trace principles and ethics, sustainable backcountry living, and wildlife biology.
All OLC participants serve as “Leader of the Day,” which means they use navigational skills to determine which path to take, when to stop for breaks, and what to do about any situations that arise while hiking. At the end of the day, the “Leader of the Day” receives feedback from trip leaders and peers.
2. Independence
Achieving independence is essential to making the transition to adulthood, and participating in challenging outdoor program with other teens is a perfect way to develop the self efficacy needed to feel confident away from home. The hard skills learned during the OLC — navigation, outdoor cooking, wilderness first aid, camping, and hiking — require independence, curiosity, and creative problem solving.
3. Communication Skills
“I love the separation from technology at camp because it allows everyone to love in the moment and have good face-to-face conversations. Especially during OLC, we spent so much time together as a group that I realized technology really draws from social interaction in everyday life.” – Sophie, OLC Participant
Effective communication is arguably the most important of all life skills. Trained trip leaders use positive guidance to facilitate reflection, dialogue and group discussion throughout the program. Leaders encourage campers to think about what happened that day, what their successes and challenges were, and how to grow from those experiences. At the end of the course, all OLC participants have improved communication skills with peers and counselors.
4. Resilience
Research shows that wilderness courses are well-suited to teach outdoor skills, self-confidence in general and confidence during adversity. Participation in an outdoor leadership program have a positive impact on emotional intelligence, specifically on stress management and adaptability. All OLC participants set personal and group goals before leaving on the backpacking portion of the course and work to accomplish those goals throughout the session with the help, direction, and encouragement of trip leaders.
A multi-day backpacking trip through the rugged terrain of the High Sierra has days that tax participants both mentally and physically. In the Outdoor Leadership Course, teens learn to push through challenges through encouragement from their trip leaders, supportive group dynamics, and building their self leadership. While surrounded by their peers, they learn just how far they can push themselves. They learn, literally, that they can climb mountains. After their OLC accomplishments, finding a way to make it to sports practice or finishing up a college admissions essay seem easy.
5. Responsibility
OLC participants are responsible for managing their equipment, completing tasks carefully and on time, admitting their role in mistakes, and working to correct those mistakes. The OLC equips campers to take the initiative to make their own decisions, fulfill obligations, and grow from their experiences.
In addition to the skills OLC participants learn and the growth they experience from the program, there is something else that too many teens don’t have the time to find; genuine face to face FUN!
“What I enjoyed about the OLC was that every day was different, some days we would do longer hikes, and others we would have a lot of time to relax and the enjoy the people and scenery. One of my favorite days out in the backcountry was when we hiked about 5 miles and then hung out in a river for the rest of the afternoon, and then made quesadillas for dinner. The food was always amazing, and there was always plenty to eat. My favorite lunch was probably Nutella and English muffins. We had a lot of Nutella.” – Charlotte, OLC Participant
If you have any questions or would like to know more, visit the Outdoor Leadership Course page, email us, or give us a call at 1-800-554-2267 ex. 0.
The Best Gifts for Kids
Most tangible, material gifts we give our children, spouse, and friends are outdated, broken, lost, or unused within months of the gifting. We can rarely remember what the gifts from past years even were.
Like most parents, I realize there are far more important gifts we give our children than the ones we wrap in December for Christmas or Hanukkah. This time of year is a great time to remind ourselves that the gifts that last are the ones that can’t be wrapped: gifts of time together and connection and of fun family memories.
As my dad’s favorite coffee mug says, “The best things in life aren’t things.”
In the spirit of this season of giving, here are a few (mostly) non-toy gift ideas. I hope you get some great ideas for each of your kids, and maybe the adults in your life, too!
The Gift of Time
Play games together
Game nights produce memories (good and bad), so maybe consider giving a group gift of a new game to play this holiday season.
Invest in a group activity
We have probably gotten the most mileage of family activity time from our basketball hoop, ping pong table, and trampoline. These are “big” group gifts that got the most mileage in both years and quality time together. So, if you have more than one child, consider one “WOW” gift that will get a lot of use. When our kids were little, a few of the most popular group gifts were a large whiteboard and a gymnastics mat. Both got many hours (and years!) of use.
Schedule “dates”
I know families who have “date nights” with each of their children. I love the idea and would like to work it into my gift giving this year. One child may want a lunch date, while another prefers a bike ride or a game of tennis. In any case, spending time with our kids, doing something they want to do with us, is a gift indeed (for both them and us). Time seems to be the hardest gift to give, but it is also most highly valued by the recipient. How about creating a gift coupon for a date that would be special for your child?
Event gifts
These can be costly, but one popular gift we’ve given our teenagers is concert tickets. Wrapping up the ticket in a gift bag with a ribbon makes it a “real” gift.
Subscriptions, Memberships, or Classes
Subscriptions to magazines, Book of the Month, music lessons, or classes are always a great way to give a gift that kids enjoy all year long! If a child has an interest in something specific and would enjoy an outing, consider researching a class or exhibit and creating a coupon or certificate to present to them. One year, I gave my daughter a one-day photography class using a local Groupon, and we had a great Saturday together in January learning how to use all the settings on our cameras.
Plan fun family events
Anything you do as a family creates memories and is a gift that will be remembered. Whether it’s a movie and popcorn night at home or a walk through the neighborhood to see the holiday lights, the gift of time as a family is so important to our kids. When we don’t default to our phones, computers, and TVs, it’s amazing what we discover there is to do!
Remember family memories
Like many of my gift suggestions, this one requires time. I love recording and recounting memories (my 36,059 photos on iPhoto prove it). My kids never get tired of hearing stories from when they were little or watching our scant supply of digitized home videos from when they were toddlers. One of my favorite gifts from my husband was a hard drive with all of our family movies digitized on it. We have had hours of entertainment watching our old home movies.
Take some time this holiday to get out the old photos (or pull them up on the screen using the cool new technology) and create a book or collage or slideshow together. We also like to list our “Top 100 Memories” of the year over the holidays. It’s fun to reflect on what we’ve done together and what’s happened over the year.
Gifts to Wrap
Books
For something to wrap, gifting books is always a great option, especially when I’m excited to have found one I have enjoyed myself and think the recipient will enjoy. And, although books are a material item, a good book has a much longer lifespan than most toys or electronic devices. Passing along a favorite, loved book (even if it’s well-used), inscribed with a personal message, is a fun gift idea. Or, giving a fresh copy of one of your favorite books or series that you enjoyed at your child’s age is a meaningful gift.
Books have the potential to be re-read, passed around, and enjoyed by many. They can take on a life of their own. While most books can be read on an e-reader or borrowed from the library, there are some that your child may value having in their personal library. When you give a book gift, be sure to inscribe the book with a note with the child’s name, the occasion the book is being given, the year, and your name. Who knows the mileage that book will have?
Another fun idea is listening to a book together on a holiday drive! Check out some fun family book listens on Libro.fm!
Personalized or Homemade Gifts
Having your name or initial on an item makes it feel extra special and shows that thought and time went into the selection.
Some of my favorite personalized gifts to give and to receive over the years have included:
Personalized stationery
Monogrammed towels, key chains, luggage
Framed photos
Collages
Letters of appreciation
Recipe & ingredients to cook something
Instructions & supplies for a science experiment
Supplies (and offer of your time) for a craft: wood working, needlework, sewing, painting, lettering, welding, etc.
Give friendship, fun, and growth
I’ll “wrap up” my gift-giving suggestions with one of my favorites (predictably, since you’re reading this on our blog), the gift of a session at camp! The gift of camp lasts a lot longer than any toy. Campers learn life skills, such as social skills, independence and responsibility, while having the time of their lives.
Many grandparents or parents give camp as their child’s big gift for the holidays. Especially for kids who have been to camp before, this is a gift they really appreciate. I like the idea of wrapping up the “You’re going to camp!” note with a campy item like a water bottle, camp t-shirt, beanie, sleeping bag, or disposable camera.
With our kids now beyond childhood, we opted in 2018 (for the first time) to forgo the major gift giving and instead had a fun trip over the holidays be our big gift. We went to Costa Rica and took surfing lessons!
Instead of running out to a bunch of stores and wearing out the UPS truck with daily deliveries (both of which I have decades of experience doing), this season I will take a few minutes to think about each family member and friend and decide what would be a special, meaningful item I can give them or experience I can offer.
I wish you a stress-free holiday season where you can focus less on acquiring more stuff and more on creating fun family memories.
Audrey “Sunshine” Monke, Chief Visionary Officer of Gold Arrow Camp, is an author, speaker, and podcaster. You can find more of her writing and resources at her website, Sunshine Parenting. Her book, Happy Campers: 9 Summer Camp Secrets for Raising Kids Who Become Thriving Adults, is available wherever books are sold.
2019 Coach’s Award
In 2009, Gold Arrow Camp lost a dear friend. Ken “Coach” Baker (March 10, 1951 – April 5, 2009) worked at GAC as Camp Assistant Director and Director from 1981-1992 and had a huge, positive impact on many of us who are still here at camp today. Ken was instrumental in helping Sunshine purchase Gold Arrow from Jeanie Vezie in 1989, and mentored Sunshine, Monkey, Woody, Chelster, Tigger, Junior, Trapper, and many other GAC staff during their early years working at camp.
Ken had an amazing way of making even mundane tasks like picking up trash and painting buildings feel monumentally important. He had a way of clapping his hands together and giving a pep talk that got everyone fired up to do their jobs well. Ken had a near-constant smile on his face and took every challenge that came his way in stride. We all knew we could go to him with any problem and he would help us figure out how to fix it.
To honor Ken, in 2009 we established “Coach’s Award.” This award has been given each year since to a leader at camp, nominated by his/her peers, who motivates others through positive leadership and encouraging words and exemplifies Ken “Coach” Baker’s dedication to GAC’s vision.
To select each year’s recipient, we ask the entire staff to complete a nomination form, where they put the name of one person whom they think deserves this honor. They include comments about the person they nominate. We have such a high caliber of staff, many of whom are extremely positive and exemplify what Coach stood for, and we are grateful for the legacy he left us and that so many people at GAC are incredibly positive and motivating to others.
This summer, we had 39 staff members who stood out so much to their peers that they were nominated for this prestigious award. Each of those 39 people made an impact with their positive energy every day at camp.
2019’s recipient, Simba, stood out in those many nominations for his positive leadership and love of camp. His name has been added to Coach’s Award, which hangs in our camp store.
There were many amazing comments about Simba, including:
To me, Simba is someone who always maintains a positive attitude and carries himself as a positive role model for campers at GAC. In my eyes as a first-year counselor, Simba is someone to model themselves off.
Simba has such a genuine love of GAC, and he truly loves his boys as much as he loves the place. I love watching him interact with his cabins and the other campers he talks to. If we’re picking people based on positive leadership, it is hard to pick someone better than Simba. Well done, Simba!
Wow man, you are so good with the kids and staff. You are a friend that I can talk to about anything.
Whenever I see him he has a smile on his face. He makes everyone feel so much better and warms people with his presence. You can tell that he puts a lot of effort into every relationship he has, with staff or a camper. He’s all about making sure his boys are having the best possible GAC experience.
Throughout this summer I have been wildly impressed with how well Simba holds himself, how he acts in the face of a challenge, and how welcoming he is in every situation. I feel like I’ve learned so much about the world and how to value life through talks and watching him live each moment to the fullest. Thank you for being so incredible, I’ll never forget what you’ve taught me.
You have made me a better, more confident person. I have modeled who I want to be as a counselor after you. You have an amazing head, sense of humor, and have never told me a lie. I feel you taught me how to be a part of Valhalla. I love you.
Simba is always encouraging other counselors to stay positive and energetic. He’s a great role model for the boys of 32 and has always found a way to make everything his cabin does enjoyable and a lasting memory.
Simba has been such a positive impact on camp and on his campers. He is super outgoing and fun for others to be around.
Simba truly embodies what it means to motivate others. He carries himself in a way that shows campers that they can be themselves. He encourages confidence, teamwork, and leadership to everyone that he meets!
For being such a positive role model and inspiration to the boys of Valhalla. Everyone in camp looks up to him and personally I aspire to one day make an impact on people in the same way that he does.
One of the greatest people I’ve ever met! He always has a smile on his face. Whenever I see him he gives me a high five. Overall great guy. 
He truly is a pleasure to be around. He is such a warm spirit and truly embraces the values of camp in himself, and in his campers. He lifts my mood and challenges me to be a better staff member, friend, and person myself. I believe that he is one of the most deserving nominees for this award.
His never-ending enthusiasm motivates not only his campers but all the staff around him. He is the most incredible frisbee golf counselor which goes to show that he can make any activity the best activity. Simba inspires me to give more to my campers and live every day to its fullest.
An incredible leader and counselor. Simba is so supportive and creative when working with his cabin. He inspires me to be a better counselor and I am grateful for his friendship and positivity. A true leader.
Simba is always welcoming to all people at camp regardless of who they are or what they do. He is always high energy with his kids and makes sure everyone feels included. He makes sure to engage everyone and makes camp a better place.
Always in good spirits, shows tremendous leadership, spreads the excitement, everyone’s hype man- constantly finding something to laugh about. Overall, he’s a good role model for everyone!
Simba was a leader in camp this year! He made a positive difference to those around him, and camp is a better place now because of his influence.
A boy inside a man’s body. Whenever you see him he’s smiling and joining in with the kids. I couldn’t believe when he said he was only 22. A great GAC role model, and an inspiration for me.
I am so impressed with his ability to lead his campers so well. He is humble, genuine, kind, fun to be around, and hilarious. So many people at camp look up to him because of the way he carries himself and the magic he makes at GAC. I am so thankful he is here and that campers and counselors alike are able to learn from Simba!
CONGRATULATIONS SIMBA!
